


There's No Bride in Gay Marriage

by Sardonicwolf



Series: Tumblr Shorts [1]
Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Cute manhandling, M/M, Sadly no actual sex sorry, Size Kink, Tumblr fic repost, Wedding discussions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-27
Updated: 2015-06-27
Packaged: 2018-04-06 11:01:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 937
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4219251
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sardonicwolf/pseuds/Sardonicwolf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Danny and Steve argues about who the bride is in their upcoming wedding. Danny seems to be winning the argument. Not that Steve cares, cause really he might have let Danny win the battle but fuck him if he'd let the smaller man win the war.</p>
            </blockquote>





	There's No Bride in Gay Marriage

**Author's Note:**

> I aready posted this on tumblr weeks back(maybe months?) Anyways, this is all started as a reply to punkashale's tumblr post... Well actually I hijacked her post with this fic... But yeah she's like the trigger for this fic...

“Come on Babe, she’s your sister and so she’ll be on this wedding for you, ergo you ARE the bride.” Danny explained leaning on the kitchen counter sipping his coffee while watching Steve put his grass-fed butter on his coffee.

“Bride? Really what’s up with your fascination with gender roles?” Steve looked to Danny with what the blonde man is calling his Slouchy Sassette Smirkling Face™. (Don't ask, Steve doesn't know how Danny even begin to even comes up with names for the faces he makes.)

“Oh, I’m not fascinated with gender roles. I’m fascinated with your manly superSEAL self having allowed your sister to talk you into including her in our wedding as ‘maid of honor’ for yourself.” Danny explained embellishing his words with pointed gestures that just drives Steve crazy. (sometimes crazy with desire.... Okay, he'd admit most times, if not all the 'times')

“I didn’t allow her to talk me into doing anything." Steve argued, brows frowned as he tried to think of a way to win against whatever this thing that Danny started. "I asked her, you know this.”

“Yeah, after months of her hinting that she would like to be one. But that’s not even the point.”

“And what is the point, Danno?”

“The point, babe, is that under that tough macho exterior, you are a complete mushy marshmallow.”

“Yeah, you’re the one to talk. You’re the one who let Grace make up whole new entourage role for herself. Dannosmaid? Really?” It's a flimsy argument that Danny could have easily countered but that's really what Steve was aiming for. Hopefully, the resulting rant would give Steve enough ammunition to launch his planned attack.

“First of all, she came up with that all by herself, with no influence whatsoever from me, " Danny started, setting aside his coffee, "I would have made her a flower girl but she insisted she’s too old to be one, so she made Dannosmaid up, since ya know, I’m no bride… Secondly people would have expected this of me since I’m actually known as that sweet loving person and a devoted father. You, my muscly valiant warrior, on the other hand would shock people into silence when you walk down the aisle after Kono and Mary…” This is the opening shot Steve is waiting for.

“I knew it! You always complain about me manhandling you but you totally love that I could don’t you?!”

“What the hell are you on about McGarrett?! We are talking about a completely different topi– wait, of all those things I said you focused on that?!”

“What else is there to focus on? You called me, YOUR muscly valiant warrior, how am I supposed to concentrate on anything else?” At that Steve proceeds to lift Danny to seat on the kitchen counter the smaller blonde was leaning on. “You know I love it when admit to your size kink.” It a weak verbal parry but Steve knew it to be enough to goad Danny to an even longer rant that would distract the compact detective from his real motives.

“I am not admitting to a size kink McGarrett. How can you say you love something you never experience? Because let me tell you I don’t remember ever admitting to a size kink. I never once…” Danny started on his rant not even noticing what Steve just did or paying attention to what the Seal was doing.

“…and if you think letting you be the big spoon constitute an admission, well I’m sorry to burst your bubble but it is NOT. Ya hear me? It is…” Steve didn’t bother trying to reply verbally. He has something else in his mind so he let Danny prattle on.

“… and really I can’t recall any other instance that would make you think…” Steve let Danny’s words wash over him as he planned his next course of action.

Danny continued on his rant, “…and that’s not selective memory because I don’t admit to something I don’t have, which in this case, a size…”

All the while Steve is sneakily sliding his hands on Danny’s hips, “… seriously Steve you need to have your brain check if you keep hallucinating things that aren’t happening cause…”

Steve’s hand continued to slide beneath Danny’s thighs as the blonde is saying, “… I know I said before that you were touched in the head but…”

Steve is now just waiting for a moment to execute his final maneuver as he continues to pretend to listen to the small blonde in his arms “… I’d really appreciate it if you would consider going to a therapist because maybe they could help with your hallucinations or-eek” Danny let out a shriek as he felt Steve lift him up.

With Danny on his arms, the blond’s hands thrown around the SEAL’s shoulders, their heads at the same height and their lips aligned, Steve wasted not a moment to get Danny to shut up with a passionate kiss that turned heated in just a few seconds.

As they separate to breathe, Steve says, “So still gonna deny that size kink? Cause that thing pressing on my stomach says otherwise. Plus I’m sure one can’t feel hallucinations, Daniel.” 

Danny is quick to counter, “Of course you can. It’s called tactile hallucinat–”

Danny tried to start a rant again, so really Steve has no choice but to shut him up with another kiss. It's a little underhanded, maybe, but the supreme art of war,  according to Sun Tzu, is to subdue the enemy without fighting. After all the only way to effectively win a verbal war is to render your opponent speechless.


End file.
